Depth of Depression:
A B.Tech graduate filling up a job application.
He came to the column 'Salary Expected?'
He thought for a while & wrote:
.
.
.
.
"YES"
Most irritating moment: morning alarms..
Most difficult task: 2 find socks..
Most dreadful journey: way 2 class..
Most lovely time: meeting frnds..
Most tragic: test in 1st period..
Most wonderful news: teacher iz absent..
Most relaxing area: canteen..
Most funny moment: teacher cracks joke n nobody laughs
Height of Coolnes!
2frnds,aftr finshng Xams.
1-dude,wich papr ws it?
2-May b maths
1-dat means u read d papr?
2-No man,d gal nxt2me,ws usin calcltor.:
Ultimate Engineering Joke:
Which is the most popular machine known to an engineering student?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Photostat machine!!
E.C.G of a Student:Normal heart
_,-._/\_,-._/\,_,-._/\
EXAM time:
_/l_/l_/l_/l_/l_/l_/l_
& when results r
announced
________________
Ninte sanidhyam njan ariyunnu.
Ninte swaram ente kathukalkku impamekunnu.
Ninte sparshanam enne unarthunnu.
Venda... "kothuke"
THALLU KOLLUM KETTO..!!
At midnyt in a hospitl,
Insyd an elevatr der was a nurse & a gal.
Dey wer passng thru 3rd floor wich ws a MORTUARY
(Dead Bodyrum)!
Sudenly d door of d elevatr opens.
Dey saw a boy rushng 2 get insyd.
D nurse ws frghtnd n closd d elevatr imediatly.
D gal got curious&askd d nurse:
R u ok?
Y did u do dt?
Nurse (Panting):
I kno hm!
He is 1 of our patients who died ystrday!
Did u C dt RED TAG on his wrist?
V put red tag on dead patients"..
In d dim lght of elevatr the girl suddnly raisd her wrist &asked smiling,
"Do u mean dis red tag"?
N d lghts of d elvatr wnt
OFF. . .
Hv a 'Nice' sleep!
Essay on duck :i lik duck.Duck lives in water.i also drink water.My neighbour uncle drink alcohol.alcohol is vry bad.It was told by gandhiji.He was a good person.he had one stick.Stick swim in water.duck also swim in water.duck take bath in water.me too take bath in water.i take bath only 5 min but duck take bath full day.so nly duck is so white.I like duck so much
Moral:
My msgs are free.I have
8000 more free msgs.:-D Coming soon..essay on fish..;-)
Namaskaram...!!
Ningalude snehathinte Validity kuranju Konde irikkunnu !!
Dhayavu cheithu Oru msg Ayachu ningalude Sneham Recharge cheyyu.... vegamakate....
10,0000 Peril 99,000 perkku
Lover undu..!
Bhakkiyulla 1000 Perko...?
'BUDHI UNDU'
.By
1000 thil Oruvan..
New generation learn d alphabets
in dis way-
A-Apple
B-Bluetooth
C-Chating
D-Download
E-Email
F-Facebook
G-Google
H-HTML
I-INTERNET
J-Java
K-Kingstn
L-LapTOP
M-MessENgeR
N-Nero
O-Orkut
P-Picasa
Q-Quick time
R-RAM
S-Server
T-Touch scrn
U-USB
V-Vista
W-Wifi
X-XP
Y-Youtube
Z-Zorpia.
Husband to wife: I am going out for five days.
Wife: Ok, but dont surprise me by coming back early, otherwise you will be surprised.
In newzealand a baby was born with 80 kg...
-it increased upto 280 kg in 15 days Incredible! But true...
bcoz its a baby of an elephant...
Teachr: Naavu kondu ira pidikkunna oru jeeviyude peru parayu...
Ramu: L.I.C. Agent..!
Gal:How Much u Love Me?
Boy:Like SHAJAHAN
Gal:Then Wen vl u Build TAJMAHAL?
Boy:Already Purchasd Land Now Waiting 4 ur Death.
Sneham vannal kettipidikan
Sankadam vannal kanneeroppan
Ketti pidichu koode kidakan
Rs.75 mudakku
Oru 'thalayana' vaangoo!
Prove:1Rup=1ps
ENGINEERING students solution:
LHS=1Rup
=100ps
=10ps*10ps
=0.1rup*0.1rup
=0.01rup
=1paise
.'. LHS=RHS
FOUND ANY MISTAKE?
NO NA;-)That's Engg.
The funniest life cycle...
COCKROACH is afraid of RAT..
RAT of CAT..
CAT of DOG..
DOG of MAN..
MAN of his GIRLFRIEND..
&
&
GIRLFRIEND OF COCKROACH..! ;)
Wife: Ettum pottum thiriyatha ente mone ningal beveragesil queue nilkan vittallo dushta
sasi:maryada, achadakam, samadanam, kshama, ithokke avanum padikatedi..
Funny but true..
"when U miss sumone,
U msg them 2 let them know that U R thinking of them, But the truth is U really want them 2 think of U....
As I am doing now....
If a Girl gets 99 marks, her response.
"Pichakaran oru mark ittu thannal entha marichu povuo?"
If a boy gts 37 marks he says "Corect cheidavan deivamada macha"
World's most unexpected Joke:-
What happens after a Lion roars?
Take a guess
?
Cum on
think!
Tom & Jerry Cartoon STARTS!
When a man is in trouble, family membrs & frnds Stand by his Side with smiling face.
The Best example is-
The Marriage Album.....
A fantastic signboard in highways 4 encouraging slow driving
"Mr. LATE" is always better than
"LATE Mr.....!"
Thaazhe Kodutirikkuna English Letters Urakke Vaayichu Veettukaare Kelppikku,
I, O, N, A, K, T, Q
Kaaryangalkku Oru Theerumaanamaakatte..!...
Why is FIRE engine RED in color?
Ans: FIRE engine has a LADDER.
LADDER has STEPS.
STEPS r 2 b climbed on FOOT.FOOT is 2 b measured by a RULER.
RULER can b a KING or QUEEN.ELIZABETH is the Queen of England.
ELIZABETH is also d name of a ship tat sails on WATER. WATER has FISHES.
FISHES hav FINS.
The ppl of FINLAND r calld FINS.
The national flag of FINLAND is RED.
So fire engine is RED in color.
This is how we write exams when we dont know the Ans!
A Girl attempt suicide for love failure...
.
.
.
.
"INTHA MATHIRI JOKES IRUNTHA PLZ SEND ME".
Sathyam
Paranjal
E
Msg
Njan
Ninakku
Veruthe
Ayachada
Kaaranam
Enikku
Msg
Freeya
Da
Ninakku
Disturb
Aakunundenkil
Vaayikkal
Stop
Cheytho
Appo
Ninakku
Disturb
Aakunilla
Alle
Athu
Kondalle
Nee
Vaayikkunad
Alle.
Nee
Vicharikkum
E
Msg
Ippol
Theerumenju
Pakshe
Ithu
Ippol
Onnum
Theerilla
Ippo
Nee
Vicharikkum
Veruthe
Ithu
Vaayichenju
Ippol
Ninakku
Disturb
Thonunille?
Atha
Paranjath
Nee
Free
Aayal
Mathram
Vaayichal
Mathiyenju
Da
Nee
Vaayikkal
Stop
Cheytho
Adiyil
Onnum
Illa ok
A Boy loved a gal very much.
He proposed but she didnt mind.
He gave love letters,
But her friends threw them.
Again the boy decided to approach the girl for the last time, that time a truck was speeding towards the girl. When it was about to hit the girl, the boy ran like hell and saved her. She asked 'how can you run so fast?' the boy replied "Boost is the secret of my energy" and instantly the girl shouted "our energy" and they lived happily together drinking boost everyday. :-)
moral of the story. :i have free msgs..
I Wanna meet u,
I want to talk with u,
I want to spend time with u, I want to admire u. BUT,
Can't.
This stupid gate keeper is saying
"THE ZOO IS CLOSED".
Feel'gs of a professor:
I don mind whn studens luk at their watchs durin class hrs.But I get angry,whn tey remove their watch & shake it 2 c if its workn;
Do You Want To Make STD Calls At Local Rate?
.
.
Then
.
.
.
Go To In That State
& Make Calls...
From
"COIN BOX".
Father: Ente 4 Makkalil 3 Per Engineersaa,
4th One, Useless, Padichilla, Barber Ayi.
Frnd: U Threw Him Out le ?
Father: No! He ONLY has a job now!!
A mom passing by her son's bedrum was astonishd.
D bed was nicly made n evrythng was packd.
She saw an envlop on d bed.It was adressd "MOM."
She opend d envlop n read d lettr wid tremblng hands
'Dear mom,its wid gr8 regrt dat im writing 2 u. I had 2 run away wid my galfrnd coz i wanna avoid d scene wid dad n u.
I'v been findin real passion wid her n shz so nice evn her dimpl cheeks n swt eyes n gud charctr. Dnt wry mom im 21yrs old i knw hw 2 tc of myslf. Sumday v'l cum n vist so u can get 2 knw ur grndchldrn'
A tear trickled down as she read on.
MOM,
none of d abov is true!
Im @ neighbors house!I jus wanna remind u dat der r worse things in lyf dan my ENGG Results in my desk.Call wen its safe 4 me 2 cum home ;-)
Dedicatd to al engg stdnts.
Ninne arum nokunathu enikishtamalla.
Ninodarum mindunnathu ishtamalla.
Karanam
enikk
orupaadu ishtamanu
Mattullavare.
Avar nasikaruth.
Whenever you feel the World is empty
& full of darkness,
just come & hold my hands...
I will take you
To
VASAN EYE CARE.
Top answrs of teachrs if dey dont knw d answrs:
1) I think d questn s wrng..
2) I'l tel u 2mrw..
3) Dnt ask foolish qustns..
4) U'l study dis in d nxt unit..
& d mst famous 1 is:
5) Nice questn, raise ur hands who knw d answr 4 ds..?? (If no one raises).. Then it is an asignmnt...!
Sweet relatnship:-
Small girl&boy r seen crying 2gther
wen askd why?
Girl says"My doll has broken"n boy says "I M cryin bcz my doll is crying
Prof explaining marketing concepts :
U see a gorgeous girl @ a party. U go 2 her n say"I'm rich.Marry me"-Its Direct Marketing
U go 2 a party wit frnds n see a gorgeous girl. 1 of ur frnd goes 2 her n say "He's rich. Marry him"-Advertising
U see a gorgeous girl @ party.She walks upto u n says"U r rich.Wil u marry me"-Brand Recognition
U see a gorgeous girl @ party n ask her 2 marry u. She introduces u 2 her husband -Thats Demand supply..
Wrongly
correctly
rightly
badly
rarely
darely
madly
surely
quickly
slowly
chilli
ghilli
idly
butly
hubli
kabali
basically
historically
Mathematically
Physically
Chemically
Socially
Scientifically
Economically
Mechanically
Electrically
Commercially
Farely
shortly
longly
BrettLee
ShaneLee
BruceLee
Jejlee
duly
fully
completely
really
highly
lowly
hardly
softly
carfully
totally
actually
truthfully
finally
I just wanted to disturb u
differently..
Clasroom is lik a TRAIN
Teacher is a Engine
1st 3 benches r VIP Executive,
Middle 3 benches r General
&
Last 6 benches are Sleeper coach..!!
Every one likes to join in Govt college but not Govt School...
Every One likes to go to Govt job but not to Govt Hospital...Funny people...
A Spanish captain was walking on his ship.
A soldier (rushing to him) : An enemy ship is approaching us.
The Captain : Go Get my Red shirt.
The soldier gets the Red Shirt for his captain.
The enemy ship comes in range and there are heavy rounds of firing exchanged.
Finally the Spanish wins.
The soldier : Congrats sir, but why the red shirt?
The Captain : If I get injured, then my blood should not have been seen, as I do not want my men to lose hope.
Just then another soldier : Sir, we just spotted another 20 enemy ships heading in our direction.
The captain : Go get my Yellow trousers.
Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2minutes!
CoNfideNt LiNes ON A WINE SHOP Board..
"BOY Who LoveS A Girl Truly,
Will ONe Day Love Me Too..."
Get up all you lazy people and do something for the nation... oh sorry it was you ??. nee urangikko..That will be better for the nation..!
Simple but true:
The person Who sends more messages to all his friends
.
.
.
.
.
.
Is The one who doesn't have a lover.
An analogy 4 all collg lecturers' teachng:
They teach us 2 make PLAIN RICE in class..
&
expct us 2 cook BIRYANI in xams!!!
Strange indeed!!
A husband's mystery-
10 years ago wen i used 2 return home,my dog welcmd me by barking & wife by kissing,
Nw Dey've exchanged their roles.
Girl in a book store. Do u hav book called
''women- The perfect intelligence"?
Sales man:, The comic department is on the other side
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